So, This Is Happening...

nI have lived in this house for longer than I have ever lived anywhere. It holds some of my happiest memories, and some of my saddest. It is the only home my youngest daughter remembers. We have said goodbye to some of our four-legged family members here, and we have watched many come into this world here.

This was our family home.  It still is, but the shape of our family has changed.  There are ghosts of that life everywhere. They come at me and take me off guard once in a while and I find myself sitting in silent tears. 

My most prized and sure to be missed aspect of this place are the sunrises and sunsets. There has not been a day go by in the years I have lived here that I don't stop and marvel at the beauty of them. My girls and I have spent many hours on our deck watching the skies morph to darkness.  The quiet mornings watching the Eastern sky come to brilliant life are magical.  I don't allow myself to think on not having these things, because I am just not able to stop my tears. 

The generations of the partridge family that parade their large broods through my yard every year.  The crazy animal visitors - moose, cougar, skunks, raccoons, and yes, even a rooster.  I've often said that nothing that I see here anymore surprises me. Llamas strolling down the road in front of my house?  Sure, why not!

There was the grass fire that we saw start across the field, South of our home. We made that 911 call and then watched, prayerful, unknowing if we were going to lose our home that day. There was the morning after yet another wicked wind storm that we found our beloved tree at the end of our lane on it's side.  I cried that morning.  The girls and I still miss that beautiful tree.

There's the heady smell of the olive tree blossoms that fill our yard and house every June. Flowers so small that you can barely see them, yet en masse, they transform the air around us for weeks.

But there also comes a time when you have to decide to move forward. This was a decision that the girls and I made as a team.  A bittersweet decision, but one that has us moving towards new memories.  New adventures.  Ones that are just ours. A turning point. An open door that we will walk through together. 

It both scares and excites me. But at least it's forward motion.